Feeding your Soul Through Self-Care

After a full, inspiring day of phone calls, meetings, excitement, and creation, you enter the threshold of your abode, drop your bags, and find yourself exhausted…. Whether from a nonstop schedule or simply, because it’s holiday season, burn out is experienced by a significant portion of our communities. Mentalities of “just get it done” and “I’ll push through until the weekend” may be great for producing results, but is it nourishing for you?

I find myself constantly reevaluating this.

Self-care can be defined as any activity we do deliberately to provide care of our mental, emotional, and physical health. Here are a few tricks that I’m working with.

1) Your body is your temple.

Whenever I hear this, it’s usually followed by a cringe. I don’t mean this in the holier-than-thou sentiment which equates with antiquated notions of purity. No, instead think of it as a place devoted to a special purpose.

Your meat suit carries you through every day. Walking down streets, hauling through workouts, a vessel of passion with partners, and a container for your energetic being. It is a highly developed, interconnected system that doesn’t exist apart from you. It’s conversational. It will talk back.

Developing a practice in checking in gives a simple inventory of where your physical self stands which you can easily come back to.

• Have I had enough water today?

• Have I provided my body with enough sustenance to sustain my activities?

• Have I moisturized my skin or washed my face?

• Am I coping with activities that don’t sit well with my body?

Your physical needs are usually the most basic, but result in a feeling of safety and grounding. Furthermore, you reinstall a sense of trust in your own psyche by reassuring yourself that you’ve got your own back.

2) Develop your relationship with your inner child.

Your girlfriend is feeling neglected because of your work deadlines. Or your boss is not being understanding of your roadblocks on a project. Your mom may be asking why you’re not coming home for Christmas… again. Shit comes up from sadness to anger and everything in-between.

Validating your own feelings when you’re trying to power through can seem time-consuming. Listening to my inner child has been incredibly insightful for me. The steps are as follows:

1. Put a name to what you're feeling.

Ask yourself, “You seem really upset right now. What are you feeling?” Take your time. It may be one thing or many.

2. Validate.

Once you label the root feels, validate it! “I understand exactly why you feel that way. It must be really hard or uncomfortable.” Give yourself the same heartfelt understanding that you'd give a friend or a child.

3. Identify what's missing.

Ask, “What do you need right now?” And that’s not for your boss to change departments. What do you need at your core that will bring you comfort or relief? It may be to rest or a hug or some dinner or to be heard. Usually what you’re needing is a basic need that is not being met.

4. Support yourself.

Imagine yourself enveloped in your arms and feel the hug. Go get a snack or further validate your feelings. Either way, allow your higher self to tell your inner child that you’ve got this and everything is going to be just fine. "I'm here, and you don't have to worry about that because I'm going to take care of it for you."

You ultimately have the power to listen to your emotions, advocate for yourself, and honor them by honoring your boundaries.

3) You can calm the mental chatter.

When feelings of self-doubt, anxiety, and to-do lists take over; it’s easy to forget “Mind Over Matter.” (I know that probably catalyzed some winter burnout, but bear with me.). We have the power to change our thoughts, the stories we tell ourselves, and our energy fields.

If you’re worried about forgetting things, carry a notepad or use the one on your phone.

If you’re feeling anxious, go for a walk, practice breathing meditation for 2 minutes, or hold a grounding stone, like hematite.

Remind yourself who you are every day. Interrupt your stories or doubt with your best version of yourself. You can even borrow one of mine.

• I am a creator of joy.

• I learn through play allowing myself to safely experiment with experiences.

• I am capable of navigating difficult conversations with grace.

• I am effortlessly, abundantly provided for.

• I can be alone, but not lonely.

• I create my best reality daily.

You wouldn't let your phone battery get to 1%. Make sure through these cold months and stressful season that you recharge as well.